This unusual job is taking us all over the country to places I would have never otherwise been to, or maybe even heard of. For example, we’re now on our way from Quesnel, BC, to 100 Mile House.
We have to pass through 150 Mile House and 105 Mile House on our way down, and then 93 Mile House, and 70 Mile House to get to Vancouver. Who came up with these exotic names?
And why are we still measuring this area in miles? We use the metric system like the rest of the world (except our patriotic neighbours, and Myanmar, I believe). But I guess “I’m from 160.34 Kilometre House” doesn’t have the same ring to it. Quesnel, which you would probably want to pronounce Kez-nell, is way more bougie and actually pronounced like Kay-nel. It almost sounds French, non?
But we’ve seen tons of incredible town names so far, it’s not just BC. Aren’t these …unusual?
Nut Mountain, Dafoe, Sheho, Colonsay, Kamsack, Wishart, Cereal, Chilliwack, Salmon Arm, Viking, Fedorah, Lone Butte, and Elnora (which admittedly is only notable because I’m from Elora). We also stayed at a place called Meadow Lake… on Assman Field.
Sheho has to be my favourite because it’s something Ru Paul would latch onto.
Then there are the more well known but still unique towns like Medicine Hat and Moose Jaw. It gets even weirder when you go East, and drive through Dildo, Spread Eagle, and Blow Me Down. These are places, people live there. Get your mind out of the gutter.
But there’s something even better about 100 Mile House than it’s name – it’s where my package is currently being held! (Seriously, minds out of the gutter, people.)
My uncle had to get it from Purolator and pay to send it.
Surely this is robbery? Robbery is illegal? Why is this happening? Unbelievable, really.
I have to leave my job site to duck into the post office/holding centre. My hopes aren’t high – I’m fully ready for something else to go wrong. Like maybe they sent it to 99 Mile, or 101 Mile House instead. Maybe they misread the label and it’s in 10 Mile House. Anything is possible. I call to confirm it’s been spotted and is tangible. It is. I ask for the address to the building, but there is no number. It’s just “across from the high school”. K that part is pretty adorable. Though it’s called Peter Skene Ogden High School, not 100 Mile School, which is somewhat disappointing.
I can’t wait, I get to the door with a big smile on my face and announce I’m here to collect a package.
“Oh no, this isn’t the post office.”
… I’m ‘bout to lose my shit.
“It’s around the corner at the back door.”
Okay, this seems more promising.
And then it happens. I get to the correct door, pick up my package that has been all over Ontario, Alberta, and BC. It is in my possession. And much bigger than I expected for a box containing a driver’s license, roadside assistance card, and toothbrush charger. What are the important additional mystery items?
After work, when we’re back at the trailer, we finally get to open the box. In addition to our requested items, there’s also some extra ECOH face masks, a small bottle of Amethyst vodka (made in my hometown), and some cigars for Chesney. VERY important contents! It was definitely worth tracking the elusive package down.